He says he doesn’t believe in marriage counseling, so he won’t go. He said it’s “out of the question”! When I suggested private counseling for myself, he said “that’s for crazy people and I don’t want to be married to a crazy woman”. I’ve changed as a person in the respect that I’m sort of rediscovering myself. He hates it and wants me to revert to the way I used to be. I don’t want to. Am I being selfish? Was I wrong to ask him to consider counseling?
I believe that’s there’s always room for improvement. Just because you have a great relationship doesn’t mean it can’t be greater. Marriage counseling could help you move up a level in your relationship.
You said your rediscovering yourself and a friend of mine once told me that when you start changing something drastic happens concerning personal relationships. I’m in that stage of rediscovery right as we speak and your husband has no business telling you what to do. He’s also very afraid that he might lose you to the changes that occurring within you right now but that’s the price of change.
If you need private counseling tke it, you have questions and your looking for answers, an old Chinese proverb goes like this:
“A man who asks is a fool for five minutes, a man who never asks is a fool forever”. Keep asking questions and rediscovery why you are here, who you are and what path you are taking. And you’re not being selfish, your husband is, and no you weren’t selfish for asking him to go to counseling, you just wanted positive change but it seems like your husbands likes the old ways because it’s comfortable and most people like to stay in their comfort zones and become defensive when people try to take them out of it.
Hopes this helps, if you need more help, email me.
Tony