The marriage is 18 years. Both parties are guilty of infidelity. We have no respect or trust for each other. Our oldest child wants us to do marriage counseling. He told me he feels nothing for me. He is only trying because of the kids. I am willing to try to quit cheating. Nobody knows of my indiscretions. I thlnk he has feelings for his other woman.

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He and I are guilty of infidelity. Our children are 15-10-3. Our oldest wants us to try marriage counseling. He has told me he doesnt love me. He still is taking care of the family financially. He is only here because he doesnt want to leave the kids. He doesnt know for sure of my infidelity. He suspects and we fight alot. We are both scared to leave. He has feelings for his other woman, I suspect. He keeps going back to her. What can I do to give either of us the courage to start over. We have been married 18 years and it is scary. I think in some weird way I still love him. I want to do the counseling. His family accepts his girlfriend over me. They invite her to family events. They dont want me around. I must admit I have went through 4 cell phones this month by throwing them at him. I beat him up the night I asked him if he loved me and he told me no. He also told me he has no feelings of passion toward me. We were seperated about 2 years ago and he moved back.

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marriage counseling does work if both parties willing to work at the problems and trust me it aint easy but worth it that is if you both really wont it

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Alright, so im sixteen, i've been with my boyfriend for almost nine months now. he doesn't push me towards sex or anything, but i know he obviously wants it, he's 17. part of me really wants to like respect my body and wait until marriage, and then the other part is like, what's the point? There's always a chance of getting pregnant even with protection, and im diffidently not ready for that, no matter what. should i wait? would people look at me differently?

Well from the way you put it, yes save it. =)
Cuz you said part of me wants to respect your body, if you think of it that way, definately at all cost wait. Because a lot of people when they are this young, will regret it.
I am 16 and no i am not a virgin, but i don't regret it. We broke up now but part of me still likes him, he changed. I still deeply love the person he was before, but its just life is unpredictable, he seems to be a total different person now. And probably when i do find a new lover then i'd regret it because first time hurts and i'd probably think, im sorry for not saving it for you, to be able to go through the pain together. =)
well people would look at you differently if they find out. haha. obviously right? If you're not ready for pregnancy then definately dont, because before we did it we laid it all out and talked about what would happen. If this guy loves you obviously he'd respect your decision and wait too.

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Dirty Sanchez: The Movie download Both have to want it to work. Counseling is a good option. But if both partners aren't for fixing things it's best to just let it go.

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My husband’s in the 82nd and we’ve been having some marital problems since he got back from Iraq 8 months ago…its to the point now we need counseling or a separation. The Army isn’t exactly a 9 – 5 job and marriage counselors aren’t 24/7, so would my husband’s unit let him have time off to see one?
We just decided tonight on counseling and I'm going to start looking for one tomorrow…I'm just curious how it would work.

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Well, if you two really really couldn't find a counselor who could help you around his work schedule (normally once per week), he could certainly ask for an hour off per week. His CO doesn't have to grant it (unless he's suffering from PTSD or similar) but there's no harm in trying.

However, most marriage counselors and therapists are available from 8am to 8pm or later. When I was younger and my parents were going through marriage counseling, my mother worked second shift and my father worked third shift, but they found someone to work with them at 7am on Mondays.

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—EDIT—
Awesome! What a great decision to make, by the way. I'm sure you'll find a good marriage counselor willing to work with your crazy schedules – it may take a bit of digging.

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Wish you all the best.

I'm in the middle of a divorce, and wondering if our former counseling records can be used. Things that the counselor said and felt about possible abuse issues are things that could be helpful for me in court. I know doctor/patient things are confidential, but since BOTH of us were in attendance at these counseling sessions, wouldn't it be admissible? Thanks!

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Yes and No. You can stipulate that you tried counseling and it did not work, but since your husband is also a patient it would technically violate Doctor Patient Priviledge. Now even if you were in attendance it would not be available because it has to do with your soon to be exes medical history and is therefore priveleged. You could have him sign a waiver, but I am unsure what the success rate is behind this maneuver. Check with your lawyer though I can be wrong.

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May 29th, 2008

my wife says she still loves me but is no longer in love with me. she says there’s no one else she wants to leave me for or anything though. i was hoping for tips or links to save a marriage because i love my wife and we have three kids also and i just don’t want it to end like this.

I’m really not sure I can help but I’ll try…

I think I don’t love my husband anymore, I’m still coming home because he wants to save the marriage and I want to give it a try. But until now, i still feel passive, like nothing will change, like, life is boring with him. I don’t know how to break it up. Like I want to put some spice into our lives. Maybe if he’ll do the extra effort, (because he isn’t) maybe that can change my view. I guess I just need a little support from him. I need more love, care, and make me feel so special. I guess you can try to do my needs to your wife…..

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Communicate, Communicate, Communicate!!!!. That is what my husband and I been doing since we started to work on our marriage. Its been working so much better for us and when there is something that we don’t like that we say or how we say it to each other we make sure that we tell each other. Our marriage is much better than what it was, I had already filed for divorce papers in the beginning of our separation and now our marriage its so much better. We are also doing our “date night” that we could not do before because we have 3 kids but we now must do date night and enjoy ourselves for the night while kids are with grandparents. Go out again like you use to, start going out like you guys did in the beginning believe me it works, you guys will fall for each other all over again. Good Luck!!!!

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It can work but only if you both want it to.

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You each need to:
1. want to work things out.
2. still care about each other, If you don’t then it’s probably time to give it up.

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3. understand and accept that you may have done things wrong.
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4. accept that you may need to make some changes in yourself.
5. be willing to be honest about how you feel.
6. be honest about things that may have happened.

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I know of people that have been and said that it was the best thing for them but it didn’t work for me because my now ex didn’t want to be there. Maybe it will be better for you. Good luck.

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my wife cries everyday because she thinks I will burn in hell. I told her I don’t believe in that silly bible stuff but it don’t stop her from crying.

No don’t lie to her. She will continue to pray for your soul. She loves you and doesn’t want you to burn in hell. Give religion a chance before you totally disagree with her. She only wants the best for you. Please don’t wait to long because if you do God will stop sending the Holy Spirit to you. If you feel a tug at your heart you know that its God letting you know he is there for you. God does love you and so does your wife.

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I lied in the beginning over pointless stuff. now after 3 yrs my wife that is a christian is wanting a divorce, I pray God's spirit moves on her heart and mind.And helps her to forgive me the damage I caused, and allows him to restore our marriage.

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Antitrust Stay faithful to God, keep praying, and don't get angry with her. Just SHOW her that you are not the same person anymore.

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A friend of mine recently almost lost her husband due to problems in their marriage. He left her this past summer, but now they are getting back together. She stayed faithful and prayerful, patient, and loving and it made the difference.

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