My husband isn't religious, so a church is out of the question. We have been paying $100 an hour and cannot afford it. (not covered through any benefits we have) We are in the Overland Park/Kansas City area.
Thanks!
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I know that your husband isn't religious but you could contact your local church and tell them about your dilemma and they might be able to put you in the right direction or give you recommendations for good but reasonably priced counsellors that don't charge a arm and a leg.I wish I could help as I volunteer a couple of hours a fortnight at a place where they provide free counselling but I live in a different country.I hope it all works out for you.Take care.
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How many marriages credit marriage counseling to saving their marriage?
January 13th, 2008
But after an affair? Did you think that w/o the counseling, the marriage would for sure ended, did it end even with counseling? Did you work it out on your own, or just walk away? Just trying to get ideas of how others either saved their marriage or if they left it and try to figure out whats best for me and maybe someone will throw an idea out that there will get my own wheels spinning. Oh, and I am not saying who the cheater is, him or me, because thats when all the judgemental answers start coming…if only people could answer the question being asked and save the judgement.
I was married to my 1st husband who cheated, and we had 3 kids so I really wanted it to work. After a 9 month break up we reconciled. We went to counseling which helped me because it made me realize that I would never be happy in that relationship. I also recognized that I was not being a good example to my kids. I wanted them to see that they shouldn't "settle" if they're miserable. They're adults now and they've always said the divorce was a good thing for everyone, including their father.
I've also gone to counseling in my 2nd marriage, due to stepkid problems. That was a tremendous help and probably saved my marriage.
Good luck to you.
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Am I wrong to ask my husband to go to marriage counseling?
January 8th, 2008
He says he doesn’t believe in marriage counseling, so he won’t go. He said it’s “out of the question”! When I suggested private counseling for myself, he said “that’s for crazy people and I don’t want to be married to a crazy woman”. I’ve changed as a person in the respect that I’m sort of rediscovering myself. He hates it and wants me to revert to the way I used to be. I don’t want to. Am I being selfish? Was I wrong to ask him to consider counseling?
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I believe that’s there’s always room for improvement. Just because you have a great relationship doesn’t mean it can’t be greater. Marriage counseling could help you move up a level in your relationship.
You said your rediscovering yourself and a friend of mine once told me that when you start changing something drastic happens concerning personal relationships. I’m in that stage of rediscovery right as we speak and your husband has no business telling you what to do. He’s also very afraid that he might lose you to the changes that occurring within you right now but that’s the price of change.
If you need private counseling tke it, you have questions and your looking for answers, an old Chinese proverb goes like this:
“A man who asks is a fool for five minutes, a man who never asks is a fool forever”. Keep asking questions and rediscovery why you are here, who you are and what path you are taking. And you’re not being selfish, your husband is, and no you weren’t selfish for asking him to go to counseling, you just wanted positive change but it seems like your husbands likes the old ways because it’s comfortable and most people like to stay in their comfort zones and become defensive when people try to take them out of it.
Hopes this helps, if you need more help, email me.
Tony
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