Jake’s Closet video Would you rather save yourself till marriage (not for any religion purposes or anything like that) just as a self respect act and a act of showing respect to your significant other. I know I would how many think it is a good moral or idea to do that? Thanks and be honest please.
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Yes,I’m in my thirties and still saving it.If it’s a turn off for the guys ,oh well.It’s not like you have a disease to give them.If a person can’t respect you,you have to respect yourself,who else is going to do that for you.Stick to your morals and don’t let people be mean to you.They have to me and the more they are the better and stronger it makes me.Hope this helps!
Please recommend some good books for me on marriage communication, and just counseling. Me and my husband have a big problem with communication, we argue about dumb small things that i believe are because we can't communicate with each other effectively. We do love each other, but he seems to be upset because im not that lovey dovey person that's all over him constantly, and that's what he want's, It's very difficult for me to change and be that person. Please tell me if theres some books i can read to help my marriage.
So many times we, men and women, miscommunicate because we are wired differently and have trouble understanding each other. That's why I recommend John Gray's, Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus. I've also listened to "The Five Love Languages" by Gary Chapman, and there are some wonderful thoughts on how we as individuals each have our own styles and help to understand the other's style of relating. Finally, I haven't read but see some excellent reviews of "The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work" by John M. Gottman, and Nan Silver.
What you will find through all of these, is two basic principles at work, 1 as taught by Steven Covey, Seek first to understand, then to be understood. The larger part of communication is listening for understanding of what is in the other's heart, and how best to release the love that is in their heart. The other is part of my personal philosophy of choosing love over power. Love does not seek to control another, but to give freedom of choice and to find the best in the other. The best method of communication I have found beyond listening, to express my wants and needs is using "I" statements to clarify my point of view without imposing my standards on another. For Instance, "When you ask for book recommendations, I want to share what I have found helpful." is an I statement that gives my point of view without invalidating your point of view, which might be different. An "I" statement is generally in the format of "when you, then I" Another for instance might be, "When you get upset because I am not lovey dovey, then I feel even less lovey dovey." On the other hand when you….. fill in the blank… I feel more lovey dovey. I hope you find this helpful. May the Blessings Be buy Essex Boys
She got a perm to save her marriage?
May 30th, 1999
I have heard that some marriages were saved when she got a perm. The husband had a new wife, but actually she was the same woman sexually, but something changed besides her hair what could of that been?
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Hmmm, sounds weird, and when you say "perm" how curly was this hair? Maybe she really did change, or the husband was really weird and just liked perms.
Does marriage counseling help a crashing relationship?
May 30th, 1999
My wife and I are going through some troubles in our relationship. We don't really fight at all in our marriage, but a few little problems came at once and we couldn't handle it like normal couples. Now we talk about divorce a lot, but I don't want that to be an option. We have been married for 5 years, we have 2 beautiful kids and we are both only 24 years old. I know couples go through really tough times together, but since we are not really used to problems.
Wondering if someone tried marriage counseling. I heard it was a lot of money and I don't have any money, but I am willing to work 2 jobs to pay for it if it will make us stronger and better.
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my husband and i have been together for 5 years and we've had our share of horrible arguments, and counseling saved our marriage. so im sure it will work wonders for your marriage, dont be so quick to spit the word divorce out, or your wife for that matter, its not that serious. unless your willing to seriously pack your crap and move out of there then those are just hurtful words. i think you should see a counselor and they can teach you how to fight fair. like giving each other to say they're side of the argument without interuppting the other person as he/she speaks. take a time out when your mad instead of blowing up on that person you should take a time out and just think before you speak. it worked wonders for us, sounds silly if you think about it, but sometimes many couples act childish! good luck to you.
Does anyone have any information about Marriage Counseling?
May 30th, 1999
Can counseling help out a marriage? How long does it take? Are their different types of Marriage Counseling? Is the cost reasonable for a mid to low income couple? If children are involved should Family Counseling be considered instead of Marriage counseling? If any one has any help information it would be greatly appreciated.
1…with the right counselor it can help a marriage a lot
2…it depends on the problems and how much work the couple is willing to put into it.
3…some counselors have a sliding scale depending on your salary.
4…the primary counselor might suggest family counseling
I think when a couple wants to save their marriage or make it better the right counselor can be the best thing they can do…..it's always worth a try.
how much does marriage counseling usually cost?
May 30th, 1999
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It depends . . . most churches are reasonable and some are free and they have the best marriage advice because it is based on the recipe to a successful marriage . . . the Word of God! If that’s not your normal cup of tea just try it at least twicw with an open mind. . . you never know.
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Is marriage counseling necessary for us?
May 30th, 1999
My marriage is going downhill and we have lots of issues that we don't agreed or is unresolved. We've talked and we always end up not seeing eye to eye. Is marriage counseling the best way to do first?
That would depend on if you both want to stay married and want to go to the counseling.
If yes to both,yes, if not, no.
Do you both have goals for the future and are they compatible?
Do you both respect the differance in opinion of the other?
If you cannot respect and work together to put enough value into the marrige to make it work, counseling may work for a while but it is only a temporary fix. A counselor can only help and guide you on making it work and flourish together if that is what you both want.
It takes two to make it work but only one to decide not to make it work or destroy it. No matter how much either wants it to and tries to make it work, if the other doesn't it wont.
It is like playing tennis, it gets better as you practice and play together but as soon as one stops playing, the game is over.